COURSE DESCRIPTION
Single people on Valentine's Day - we hear you, we see you, we are you. Maybe you view V-Day as an excuse to have every meal consist of some form of chocolate. Maybe it’s the day you avoid all calls from your mother knowing full well she’ll just shame you for not ending up with that guy from preschool. Or maybe you view it as the most tempting day to send that flirty/evil/self-imploding text to your ex. Put. The. Phone. Down. Grab your best Glossier face mask, pour yourself a big ol’ glass of 19 Crimes, and plant yourself in front of a movie that completely destroys the idea of a healthy relationship. Here’s our selects that will leave you grateful that your only company is your Alexa.
WEEK 1: Get Out (2017, Peele)
When you’re single, you don’t face the threat of being kidnapped and lobotomized by your prospective in-laws. That’s a plus, right?
WEEK 2: Freaky Friday (2003, Waters)
Chad Michael Murray singing “...Baby One More Time” outside Jamie Lee Curtis’ window on the eve of her wedding rehearsal dinner that he later CRASHES is nothing short of a beautiful disaster. Jamie Lee GET OFF this child’s motorbike!!
WEEK 3: (500) Days of Summer (2009, Webb)
Getting angry with a woman because she doesn’t live up to the quirky, Smiths-obsessed fantasy you constructed of her isn’t love; it’s a bouquet of red flags. Anyone who thinks this movie is romantic is a fucking psycho.
WEEK 4: Heathers (1989, Lehmann)
Veronica and J.D.’s relationship is based off their shared passion for having sex on croquet courts and murdering people. If this is what love is, we’ll pass.
WEEK 5: 17 Again (2009, Steers)
You don’t have a significant other, so you don’t need to feel an ounce of guilt over openly thirsting for 20-year-old Zac Efron in this film...well, except that his character is supposed to be in high school, so maybe not. Have fun with that cognitive dissonance.
WEEK 6: Fatal Attraction (1987, Lyne)
As long as you aren’t listening to opera in the dark while turning a lamp on and off or feeling any murderous tendencies when you look at a bunny rabbit, you’re doing great sweetie.
WEEK 7: Clueless (1995, Heckerling)
Cher’s literal romantic options in this film are a gay man and her step-brother. As children of divorce, the latter is extra frightening for us. Cher should have just stuck to her true love: clothing.
EXTRA CREDIT:
Audition (1999, Miike)
Pierrot le Fou (1965, Godard)
Bonnie And Clyde (1967, Penn)
Natural Born Killers (1994, Stone)
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