In the era of COVID, our lives have collapsed into our homes. Our abodes now encompass work, play, relaxation, frustration, existential dread, ennui. One category of clothing has usurped all others for tackling a day in the quar: loungewear. Loungewear, however, does not have to mean the same pair of stained gray sweats (no judgement). It can be as vast and varied as the emotions you have during the 5 minutes your Trader Joe’s Butter Chicken takes a lackadaisical whirl around the microwave. For your inspiration, turn to these characters:
If You’re Glamorous and Sinful like Madison Lee…
Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle is a perfect escapist film: Justin Theroux is a low-rent Colin Farrell, the laws of gravity barely exist, and Bernie Mac shouts “it’s raining white women;” however, the true show-stopper of the film - and a loungewear inspiration - is fallen angel Madison Lee, played by the ageless Demi Moore. Madison is a legend - she won the Nobel prize in astrophysics for her research in flying mammals, she invented the molar mic (an internal communication device located on the rear molar), and she used the Cosmo Bedside Astrologer to anticipate the moves of criminal masterminds. With a resume like that, her stay-at-home look has to be as OTT: an ankle-length fur coat over lace lingerie. It’s aspirational, fabulous, and definitely evil (those obliques and heels, in this Quar?). Madison Lee was never good - she was great, and so was her take on loungewear.
If You’re Angsty and Sick Of Your Family like Debbie Thornberry...
If you deign to put on jeans, at least choose a pair that pay homage to notable angsty teen, Debbie Thornberry from The Wild Thornberrys. A true social distance pioneer, Debbie paved the way for those who want to stay in their room forever while wearing her classic Q outfit: orange crop top, oversized flannel, and baggy, stolen-from-your-boyfriend jeans. Do your best to ignore that your family is roving the world for a nature show and that your sister can talk to animals. Bring a beret and a copy of Howl and you’re ready to use your time at home to stay comfy and like maybe EVOLVE?
If You’re Classic and Posh like Holly Golightly...
You bring an air of glamor to everything you do, including sleeping. You’re detail-oriented and wouldn’t be caught dead without eyelashes (this includes on your eye mask). If this sounds familiar to you, take inspiration from the classic It-Girl-on-a-budget, Ms. Holly Golightly from Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Éléments like the fuzzy earplugs, the somehow-still-done-bouffant, a white night shirt, and (if possible) adoring cat make it clear that while you may not be a millionaire, you’d be absolutely darling at it.
If You’re Quirky and a Realist like Clementine...
If you are quarantining with your significant other, you’ve gotten to know each other on a deep level. The novelty of the dog you just rescued together is wearing off. Your utensil drawer overfloweth with duck sauce packets from your multiple nights a week of Chinese take-out. Grooming is out the window. Take a cue from Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and mix your style with your SO’s: your silk robe and bra on top, his flannel pants on the bottom. Sit together and stare into the unknown on the couch. Lean in to the melding and maybe you won’t want to erase each other from your memory after this ends.
If You’re Romanticizing a Toxic Ex Just to Feel Something Like Jack Whitman…
Are you alone and thinking about that special someone who hurts so good? Look no further than Jason Schwartzman as Jack in The Darjeeling Limited. What better way to yearn for a past lover than to smoke out of train car windows that pass through India while wrapped in an iconic robe? This robe is pure majesty: the ankle length oozes the “what is work?” laissez-faire of a trust fund baby, while the mustard yellow cloth with red piping is an irreverent sartorial take. You may never be friends with that ex, but this robe sure won’t let you down.
If You’re a Cool Mom Who Is Clinging to Youth Like June George…
The Juicy Couture Tracksuit™ is a cultural artifact that will stand the test of time: it is over the top, comfortable, and clearly down to clown if it says “JUICY” on the ass. If you are feeling your early 2000’s oats, take a cue from Amy Poehler as June George in Mean Girls and whip that bad boy back out. Make some drinks for your underage kids. Get the scoop, the 411. See if anyone needs a condom, maybe some snacks. You may not be able to break out the video camera for your daughter’s recital, but making a Tik Tok will do.
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